Welcome Home

#1
Alright, where was I? Cars, that's right. I still work in a shady industry, now a little further west than where I began, but no matter where I find myself geographically, it seems that the industry is still the same.

Just today, a guy walks into my job, wanting me to appraise his '96 Acura with 47,000 miles, wanting to know how much I would give him for it. I took his keys and my clipboard out to his vehicle and performed my walk-around.

Appraising a vehicle would appear to be a simple process, but it is very far from it. I start by walking around the vehicle to see if there is any major flaws with it, ie., dents, scratches, dings, after-market accesories. Next, I take down the vin number. This number is important because of the information it discloses about the vehicle (year of manufacture, country codes, etc.), When this is done, I write down the milage of the vehicle, the options it has, packages that may have been added, the condition of the interior, if all the accesories work. After this is completed, I walk around the car. I feel for paintwork, look for oil sludge, see if there was any body work done to the vehicle, check the condition of the unibody frame. When the physical check is done, I then determine the value of the vehicle using several forms of information. I have invoice guides, auction results, current purchase price from wholesalers around the country, insurance claim checks I can run on any vehicle, and so on. Tying all this information together is what allows me to give the customer a price for the vehicle. I do all this in less than eight minutes.

Going back to the Acura, I found a few things. The car was in an accident so it had unibody damage. The entire vehicle had been repainted, and most importantly, it had run through our very own auction just 6 months earlier. A wholesaler had purchased the Acura for $3000 dollars and with 96,000 miles. I had the entire history of this car, from coming off the boat in Japan in late '95, to the sale 6 months ago.

I sat the customer down, offered him some coffee, and asked him a few basic questions. When did you buy the car? How much did you pay for it? What were the issues with the car when you were buying it as told to you by the seller, etc.

He had purchased the car 4 months earlier, told it was in perfect condition and very low miles for a '96. He paid $12,000. Needless to say he nearly blew his colon when I presented the info I had on his car and now offered him $2000 for it. This is what the car was now worth with a True Miles Unknown designation. I wish I could say this was a rare occurance, but it isn't it. The seller of the vehicle "washed" the title so that the information on it now reflected the changes he had made (rolling back the odometer, erasing the accident information). It's sad to say, that even though this is fraud frowned upon, there is no legal recourse for the consumer. Please be careful when buying a used car, from anyone.

Man, it feels good to "come up for air". It's been a long and whacky month. I'm slowly getting used to the colder weather here. It's nice to come back here though.
 
#2
So this is what it's like to have a life. I have to remember to update this thing a little more regularly.

I was off for the most part today, just went to work briefly this morning to teach a class on ethics. Yes, ethics, in the car industry. There aret hings that new emplyees have to learn, and former car employees have to unlearn. I was picked to do this because of my passion on the subject.

I always begin the class by reciting the reason we were created. A few years ago, the CEO of our mother company, was in the market for a used car for his child. He bought a vehicle that he thought would be good for a first-time driver, a car with a good reputation for reliability. I won't go into the entire story here, let's just say that he was misled in his purchase.

Not all of us have the financial means or the business sense to change an entire industry, but, this guy did. A few years earlier, he had opened a small electronics store that quickly grew, and if I were to mention the name here, you would definately recognize it. He proposed to open a car lot, using the ideas behind any large retail business. He set up a way to purchase the vehicles, distribute them, price them, service them, and to be completely truthfull with our customers. In fact, we use the same mold as most succesful large retailers (think Walmart) use.

The lot was an instant success, and more than once save the electronics side of the company. We were by far, the most profittable branch of the company. We quickly grew around the country, and we have planned to double our size every year for the next five years. We have also recently broken away from our parent company and are now our own company, publicly traded.
Everyday I gain a new respect for this company.

Even more important to me than this, is my new life. I find out new things everyday that melt my heart. One of the first things that I learned was that Mrs. Algernon liked to sleep with a night light. She first told it was because of her night vision slipping, but that theory has yet to be proved - her eyesight seems better than my own. I thought that it was an incredibly sweet thing, though. At first, she thought that I was going to make fun of her, but how could I? I love her more dearly than any person before, and I love who I am around her. I told her that I was not going to let anything happen to her.

The next night, I brought a chair out and my baseball bat, and sat right outside our window. I told her that I would do anything to make her feel safe when she finally coaxed me inside. We haven't slept with a night light after that first night, and I hope she never feels the need for one again.
 
#3
What a crappy day today was. A couple of days ago, I was playing flag football with a few people from work. This has become somewhat of a tradition in this new store. Since Sundays are late days for us, we take the opportunity to get to know eachother better by playing a competitive sport.

We meet in a field a quarter mile from work, put on the equipment and play. It was the third quarter, and I was going for a long pass. The ball was going to be over my head, and my opponent was right behind me. I had to jump and stretch to catch this ball. As I did this, I felt a twinge of pain on my right shoulder, but not too bad. As I came down, my over-zealous coworker, somewhat upset that I stole the turnover from him, tapped me a bit too hard before I made contact wth the ground.

What this did, was to knock me off balance, and in order not to lose the ball, I came down right on the right shoulder I had just hurt. I was in pain, bad. It took me a little while to stand up, and even managed to play a couple of more downs. I knew when to stop though.

With the hurt shoulder, I went to work, showered there, and went on with my day. It wasn't until yesterday, that I started to worry. So, on my honey's suggestion, I went to see the doctor today. It was a good news/bad news scenerio. My shoulder, thank god, was fine. Unfortunately, my right arm is broken. Gypsy, before you freak, it was a hairline fracture, no cast is needed. The inconvenience that I face off the bat, is that my Boxster is a stick-shift. I had to turn it in today and pick out an automatic. The only thing available is a Volvo with a broken radio. Life sucks! Oh, and I'm going to have problems for the next few weeks lifting hoods. Other than that, I'm getting a lot of sympathy from home. I was told today that I am no longer allowed to play football with the guys. Oh well, what better reason to stay home in bed a few extra hours on Sundays. Life is good.
 
#4
I can honestly say I like my job, I don't LOVE it though. This was the jist of the conversation I had with Rick, my boss, today. Rick likes to speak to the buyers individually at least once a month. Today was my day.

I understand the reason for these conversations. The company does give us an open checkbook to go out and buy as many cars as we need. It is not uncommon to write out checks totalling over two million dollars. The company gives us a guidelin on what to buy, but ultimately, it is our gut that tells us what to buy. We are judged by how well we buy and how well our purchases sell, every good business has ways to measure success. My numbers are pretty damned good, if I do say so myself. I have yet to have a car "kicked". This means that a car that we buy to put in our front lot, has some hidden damage that wouldn't allow us to sell it. This equates to a loss of several thousands of dollars. It's a miracle that I have gone this long without a 'kick". I, of course, just jinxed myself by writing this.

This leads me to the conversation I had with Rick. He loves my numbers, but he does have a couple of concerns. He worries that I'm not "passionate" about the job. It's a fucking job, for Christ's sake! I am given a task and I do it to the best of my ability. I can point out several buyers that are indeed passionate about this job, but are bleeding money out of the company. "Would you like me to set aside porn for Autoweek, Rick? Would you like me to spank to that instead?" Maybe it's me, because I have no clue about what he is asking of me. I come in early and stay late, I've worked through a few days off in the past, I come to work when I don't need to to study the inventory, I take it upon myself to train the newer guys and give them a sense of pride for their company. No, I haven't gotten the tattoo of the company's logo yet. No, I would rather be home with the wife rather than a bar with the guys from work. No, I don't really care about the car I drive. No, I don't care about the football scores you guys are so "passionate" about. "Rick, I think you have reached the edge of my commitment to the company. If we were in business selling tomatoes, I would approach it the same way I am approaching the car industry, and I would be damned good with tomatoes too."

Wow, that felt good. Thanks for the ear. I will try to be happier next time I talk to you. Oh, and Ouch! My damned "passionate" broken arm is stinging from typing so fast.

Y'all have a passionate day.
 
#5
I am starving right now. Recently, I stopped going to lunch at work and by the time I make it home, I'm ravished. I didn't stop eating lunch because I wasn't hungry, I just got tired of the multitude of questions people ask me. I'm a vegan, have been for many years. The first time I went to lunch in this new location, I went with several of the guys just to get acquainted. The choice of restaurants was interesting, the Outback steakhouse.

Of all the places to move to, I chose the fucking steak capital of the world, but, being as inventive as I am, I chose a salad. The guys looked at me a little strangely as I asked the waitress for the ingredients to the salad. Of course the salad would be loaded with cheese. "Can I have that without cheese? No, really, I don't want any steak on top of that, thanks. Dressing? Do you have vinegrette? Oh, gravy base, alright, how about you bring me a whole lemon, I'll cut it myself and use the juice as the dressing. No, I'm not on a diet, really."

This is just the conversation with the waitress. After she leaves, the million questions from the co-workers begin. "I've been eating this way for years, guys. No, no fish either, no, no milk. Because I think it's cruel. Yes, I've eaten it before. No, I don't think that particular sex act is cruel to animals, I should have specified prepared meat. Then again, I don't really know your preference, do I? No, no chocolate, or refined sugar. Really, couldn't go a day without eating meat? Calcium? Collard greens have more calcium than milk, ounce for ounce. I get proteins form beans and rice, as well as tofu products. Oh, you know a vegeterian? Really, your kids won't eat meat either?....

Do you wonder why I've cut my lunch breaks out? I feel like how Mr. Rogers would feel, if the cameras were on him 24/7, having to explain every damned thing I'm doing as I'm doing it.
 
Top