"Don't just stand there - do something! The pause hurts.. it's too quiet... it feels like an eternity... until one of us has the balls to get off the wall..."
As I read some awesome journal entries, I wanted to start one up too. But I'm afraid, nervous, embarrassed. Fuck it, I just have to get off the back wall and see what happens. I hope to use this journal to track my experience with improv right from the very beginning.
My level 1 grad show is this sunday (2:30). I don't feel ready. Will I ever feel ready? I feel kind of psycho because one minute, I think I can do okay, then the next, I wonder if I'll just be allowed to work the lights someday, or collect tickets at the UCBT.
I can't reiterate how amazing this experience has been so far... the new friends I've made in my class, learning an entirely new art form, my life taking a totally new path. Taking this class was something that seemed fun to do. But now I want improv to be my life.
It's funny, my real job has taken such a back seat to classes and practices.
Our last class was on tuesday. Ari is an awesome teacher, and our group has such a great dynamic. I feel like we are a new family, like we got married and will love each other for better or worse, till death do us part. How amazing is it to throw yourself into something so scary, and when you look at a friend across the room, and they smile with their eyes, saying "fuck up, I won't care."
After the very first class, when I bailed during Hot Spot, I wanted to bail from this whole thing. I didn't think I could do it. Then, after the second or third class, I started to feel comfortable with the group, with Ari giving notes, and I felt pretty damn good. But now, as our show is coming up, I feel like I'm back to square 1. Maybe square 2. I don't know.
My final notes were to get out of my head during a scene, and I can't do anything now.. I mean anything, like brush my teeth, without being in my head.
I hate it when there's a pause between scenes... I just go. I don't want my class to be the ones who were quiet, afraid. Fuck that. But then I get out there with nothing to do but play, and I freak out, and I think, and it sucks, and I wonder, am I doing them a favor, or am I ruining their experience? It's a matter I need to solve for myself before this show on sunday, or this stupid, insecurity will overwhelm me.
So, here I am, 8 classes completed towards learning how to improv. It's hard, and I love it. It's new. It's like when you get a crush on someone, and your heart freaks out in your chest at the thought of seeing them, how you can't be totally yourself yet because you want that person to like you so much, you forget your own name.
pause, pause... one step, another step,... oh boy, here it goes..
As I read some awesome journal entries, I wanted to start one up too. But I'm afraid, nervous, embarrassed. Fuck it, I just have to get off the back wall and see what happens. I hope to use this journal to track my experience with improv right from the very beginning.
My level 1 grad show is this sunday (2:30). I don't feel ready. Will I ever feel ready? I feel kind of psycho because one minute, I think I can do okay, then the next, I wonder if I'll just be allowed to work the lights someday, or collect tickets at the UCBT.
I can't reiterate how amazing this experience has been so far... the new friends I've made in my class, learning an entirely new art form, my life taking a totally new path. Taking this class was something that seemed fun to do. But now I want improv to be my life.
It's funny, my real job has taken such a back seat to classes and practices.
Our last class was on tuesday. Ari is an awesome teacher, and our group has such a great dynamic. I feel like we are a new family, like we got married and will love each other for better or worse, till death do us part. How amazing is it to throw yourself into something so scary, and when you look at a friend across the room, and they smile with their eyes, saying "fuck up, I won't care."
After the very first class, when I bailed during Hot Spot, I wanted to bail from this whole thing. I didn't think I could do it. Then, after the second or third class, I started to feel comfortable with the group, with Ari giving notes, and I felt pretty damn good. But now, as our show is coming up, I feel like I'm back to square 1. Maybe square 2. I don't know.
My final notes were to get out of my head during a scene, and I can't do anything now.. I mean anything, like brush my teeth, without being in my head.
I hate it when there's a pause between scenes... I just go. I don't want my class to be the ones who were quiet, afraid. Fuck that. But then I get out there with nothing to do but play, and I freak out, and I think, and it sucks, and I wonder, am I doing them a favor, or am I ruining their experience? It's a matter I need to solve for myself before this show on sunday, or this stupid, insecurity will overwhelm me.
So, here I am, 8 classes completed towards learning how to improv. It's hard, and I love it. It's new. It's like when you get a crush on someone, and your heart freaks out in your chest at the thought of seeing them, how you can't be totally yourself yet because you want that person to like you so much, you forget your own name.
pause, pause... one step, another step,... oh boy, here it goes..