Crush On Bergeron Live Log

[Aaron Bergeron]

[My assistant is typing this.

She is pretty and I will marry her.

Ah, yes. Now to simply look at what she's written...

Miss Delicious! I did not say you were comely nor did I promise a proposal.

And now that I look at what you've written again....I must cry out:
Your name is not Miss Delicious!

It's Mrs. Delicious.

I hope your husband,
Hollywood stuntman Darren Delicious, does not read your kiss cravings.

Isn't his fadingly rugged body scarred enough?

Must his heart also crash through a safety glass windshield?]

See Crush On Bergeron Live
Tonight - and all Weds in June @ 8 @ UCBT.

"watch slowly"

 

[Aaron Bergeron]

This is Darren Delicious

[My wife, Mrs. Delicious is typing this. Wait let me check something.
Awwwww.

You wrote "Mrs."

You honor our marriage and I reward you with...a stunt!

{Note: My husband is lighting himself on fire and is stopping an approaching motorcycle doing a pop a wheelie by grapping the elevated wheel.
Sigh. I did love him.
DID!
DID!
Now there is another like NONE other.
I hope he doesn't mind I'm using his office. I can't help it. It's located inside one of the gargoyles atop art deco's Chrysler Building.}

Wifey! I am nearly extinguished.
Did you chronicle my action?

Let me spy your touch typings.

What have you written?

You mean....

BERGERON! ]

See Crush On Bergeron Live
Weds @ 8pm @ UCBT.
"watch slowly"

 

[Aaron Bergeron]

My name is Motorcycle Michelangelo

[Mrs. Delicious is typing this.
I was riding my sidecarless crotch rocket when one Darren Delicious buzzkilled my “standing ovation.”

My hog squealed like a motorcycle and I have been super bummed since.
Keep in mind, me being super bummed is a big deal.
I’m usually super amped.

But, sadly, not super human.

Until now.

The attractive, but not for me, Mrs. Delicious has provided me with a Super Soldier Elixir.

Regardless of my heroic wants, I am also parched.
Thus, this is the perfect time to sip away the day.

{Motorcycle Michelangelo drinks the potion}

I am redone!

The viscous drink has given me ice breath and fire feet (presumably to roundhouse “kick melt” whatever I breathe on).

Now to pay back Mrs. Delicious for these gifts.

She has but one request:

To take out the seemingly invincible Darren Delicious.

Apparently, she loves another like NONE other.

I’m not sure who that is…oh wait…I just used logic.

BERGERON! ]

See Crush On Bergeron Live
Weds @ 8pm @ UCBT.

"watch slowly" and Never Let Down

 

[TerryJ]

I am in this show and I still don't understand this thread.

Come out (every) Wednesday night, 8pm @ UCB and we will increase your misunderstanding of things.

-Terry

 

[TerryJ]

Explosive!

 

[SuperDaize]

I do tech for this show and I don't get the thread either, but that could have something to do with the fact that I didn't read the whole thing.

Here is what i do know...

I watch this show every week, and I think I laugh more and more each time.

See it.

Wednesday.

8pm.

Go.

Why not?

That is not a good reason.

Your loss.

See it!

 

[Aaron Bergeron]

This is Darren Delicious

My wife, who gifted a man with powers and the desire to kill me, is typing this.

I agree with Terry and SuperDaize and Baku.

This is a confusing and explosive! time to be alive.

Yet, it is also glorious and full of hope.

For instance, I just found a stone spear.

I believe this was the possession of a Norse-like God.

Zounds!
What is that surfacing in the Atlantic Ocean?

{Once Darren grasped the spear with his mitts, a 213070707 story Monstrosity – one with the body of a cheetah and the head of a killer whale – sprang out of the sea to engage him in war.

The war is happening as I, the scheming Mrs. Delicious, type this.

Darren throws his deity spear.
It gashes the Beastie’s marathon torso.
Racing from the wound is a gaggle of flying, winged-chameleons the size of UPS Stores.
Apparently they were swallowed by the Creature and lived in one of its countless, bottomless stomachs.

Darren kills one of the airborne color-shifters with his bare hands and uses it’s carcass to create a crude saddle.
He throws it on another one of the flying lizards and rides that bucking reptile into combat.}

YOU! The Orca-headed, fastest mammal!
Heed these words as though they were sung by a musical seer:
I shall tear out your shot-glass sized teeth and use them as runes.

And they will guide me on how to best destroy the rest of your body.]

See Crush On Bergeron Live Tonight.
And All Weds in June @ 8pm @ UCBT.
“watch slowly”

 

[Aaron Bergeron]

This is the Orca-headed, fastest mammal

[Mrs. Delicious is typing this.

YAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG! ]


See Crush On Bergeron Live
Weds @ 8pm @ UCBT.

"watch slowly"

 

[Aaron Bergeron]

This is Mrs. Delicious

[I am typing this.

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGG! ]


See Crush On Bergeron Live.
Wed @ 8pm @ UCBT.

"watch slowly"

Never Let Down.

Don't be a douche.